Song; Miss Wanna Die (English Cover) by Jubyphonic.
(With adjustments to the lyrics to avoid so much repeating and better fit the characters in some spots)
Characters; Drogo and Euric. Liulfr mentioned.
Context; Just uh… The twins. Yeah. Approximate ages will be given.
*~*~*~*
*So, uh… After Liulfr’s death, both of the twins had their mental health take a swan dive. For Drogo, this led up to a suicide attempt, a second suicide attempt immediately after, and then later on an alcohol addiction.*
Drogo (12), after that first suicide attempt; “Awake, I open my eyes to see a hospital, so white and clean…”
Drogo (12), after the first suicide attempt, on his way for the second; “I was walking out to the roof, I think, then I can't recall at all a single thing…”
Drogo (12), referring to how Euric (12) was there for the first and now also the second attempt; “Held a hand for me… You were there, I know, but couldn’t reach to me… I would fall down all the time but stand and reach my hand to see…”
Drogo (12), actually sort of to Euric (12), in an odd slightly dissociated manner; “Have you tried crossing over yet?”
Drogo (12), immediately after Euric (12) manages to prevent/stop the second suicide attempt; “Wanna die, wanna die, but don’t really wanna die… You were there, you would care, making me aware— Every scar, all the blood, more and more than ever done— Not enough, not enough…”
Drogo (12), as Euric (12) holds him, albeit oddly hesitantly, after having prevented/stopped the second suicide attempt; “Wanna die, wanna die, but don’t really wanna die… If I died, you would cry, and I don’t know why— Every scar, all the blood, more and more than ever done— Not enough, not enough…”
*POV change! Onto Euric now! We also get a lot of time change here too but uh… I’m kind of lazy so it’ll be shown mostly by the approximate ages rather than context things like this.*
Euric (12), actually in reference to Liulfr (died at 13, would be 14) and the PTSD/flashbacks that watching your best friend die and dying yourself would give someone, but also the first time Euric (12) experiences Brief Psychotic Disorder, especially near the end; “When I forget you, I’m all alone without a place to go but then… Played a mirror like a show, the past I used to know, a dream… Til I see every part of you—”
Euric (12), again just some more symptoms of Brief Psychotic Disorder and also some building blocks of his Paranoid Personality Disorder and Hypervigilance that really starts to kick in; “Eyes of red following and—”
Euric (11), watching Liulfr (13) die, himself also dying, watching blood pool under him and pour out from his mouth, crying and absolutely desperate; “I wanna live… Wanna live… Deep inside I’ve always been…reaching out for a hand… So don’t let this be the end—”
Euric (12), some more Brief Psychotic Disorder mixing with PTSD from, you know, literally dying; “Mushrooms growing on my head—”
Euric (11), thoughts on Drogo (11) actually since he definitely wouldn’t survive without him or Liulfr in his opinion, right before Retry is discovered/used for the first time; “Still remember even then… Where you are, if I’m dead…”
Euric (18), because he gets his own good little bout of depression too, of course, but he’s the protector and obviously no one would survive without him so; “Wanna die, wanna die, but don’t really wanna die… You were there, you would care—”
Euric (18), to Drogo (18), kind of lashing out, upset that his twin can go through with suicide attempts while he’s stuck protecting the group no matter how he feels, no matter how much he wants to kick the bucket too; “You know it really isn’t fair! Every time I forgot, you remained inside my thoughts—”
Euric (26), part of the mafia now, realizing that protecting his twin and the group isn’t as necessary, that they don’t need him for it as much anymore, and realizing he can’t trust or rely on his twin as much as he used to anymore; “Not enough, not enough…”
Euric (27), referring to Logan (25) a little now, still dealing with the depression that he never really even got to actually work through up to this point; “Wanna die, wanna die, wanna die, but I still couldn’t die with you by my side…”
Euric (27), referring both to Logan (25) and Liulfr (died at 13, would be 29), when he carved the LNI into the tree during his first ever visit to it; “Behind the days we spent alone, afraid… Now you’re here to stay…”
Drogo (28), to Euric (28) during that year’s visit to Liulfr’s (died at 13, would be 30) tree, in reference to his multitude of suicide attempts (which had continued beyond the two) and also just in reference to Euric (28) too; “And the scars never fade…”
Euric (28), still slowly losing his trust in Drogo (28) but willing to indulge at least the small attempt at bonding and reminiscing; “Memories that replay.”
Drogo (28), to Euric (28), referring to the day that Liulfr (died at 13, would be 30) died and everything that had happened since; “Rewind, yet again, to the pain we felt on that day.”
Summer 
Night Weather: 
Earthquake Moon: 
