Reconnecting With The Past

Part 1: A Letter

Characters; Akira, Garvin, Ingall, Nico, Revan, and Merlin. Romilly (Akira's mother) mentioned.

Word Count; 2903

TWs; Swearing, Panic Attacks, Mentions of past physical and mental neglect, Mentions of past physical, mental/emotional, and sexual abuse, Mentions of past character death, General Angst, Messy Writing, and probably more-

Notes; Sooo, I thought of another angsty story. Oops.

I know I vaguely mentioned that Romilly may eventually show up in AFCS, but I'm not really sure about that for a lot of reasons. However, I will say she's very determined to find Akira again and reconnect with and apologize to them for abandoning them, so I figured that could be a fun thing to write out. I'm gonna say this probably takes place after the polycule have been living together for a while. They probably have several animals but no kids yet, lol

This one's going to be split into two parts because Akira's gonna need a minute to react after the first part, lmao

Enjoy the pain and suffering of our darling purple-haired street rat :D

—

"Oira, I swear to god, if you steal one more piece of cookie dough you won't get to try the finished product!" Nico huffed, slapping Akira's hand away as they reached for the bowl of prepped cookie dough for what must have been the third time in the past hour. "That goes for you too, Vin."

Akira shared a glance with Garvin and grinned, shrugging. "Sorry, Nico."

"Ya just did such a good job." Garvin added, smirking. "Can't help it 'f it tastes good."

Nico shook his head, turning away to hide the smile spreading on her face... Which didn't work well all things considered. "Well, I'm sure it'll taste even better baked."

"Is it double chocolate?"

Ingall's voice was soft as usual, redirecting Akira's attention as he entered the room.

"Yep!" Nico grinned, placing the last of the cookie dough on the baking sheet just as the oven beeped to announce it was done preheating. "I thought you'd approve."

Ingall's face lit up a little at the confirmation and Akira's heart fluttered. While Gall was getting better at expressing his emotions, excitement was still far from common.

"Yes, I love chocolate." He stated, pausing a moment as he seemed to search for the correct wording. Nico's smile softened as he picked up the tray and slid it in the oven, patiently waiting as Ingall gathered his thoughts. "Thank you for thinking of me, Nico, I appreciate it."

His voice was matter-of-fact, but Kira almost died right then and there at how utterly adorable it all was. Beside them, Garvin was also clearly stricken, a large smile spread across his face.

"Of course! I'm always thinking of you, Gala, don't mention it. Now, we just wait fifteen minutes and they should be good to go!"

As he set the timer, the sound of the front door opening was heard and Merlin, who had been laying at Garvin's feet, looked up, tail wagging happily as Revan entered the house.

"Hi Revy! Welcome home!"

Revan hummed, adjusting so he could properly support himself as Nico rushed over and practically tackled him as usual, accepting a kiss shortly after.

"Thank you, Nico. Hello everyone."

"'Sup Vans."

"Hey Revan."

"How was your day?"

Revan nodded slightly in response to Ingall's question, walking over to take a seat at the kitchen table, Nico still clinging to his arm. "Good." He held up an envelope and slid it across the table to Akira, eyes searching their face as they picked it up with surprise. "I found it in the mail when I got here. It has your name, but there's no return address or anything, not even a stamp, the person would have had to deliver it by hand."

"Mmm, weird." Akira glared at the envelope for a moment before opening it to reveal a hand written note. Which was even more odd because who the hell would sit down and hand-write something when they could call or text? Plus, the handwriting didn't look familiar, which ruled out Leo, who was the most likely suspect with his tendancy to do things 'just for fun.' "The fuck writes anymore?"

Shaking their head slightly, they opened the letter and started reading, their confusion growing with every word.

'To my dear Akira,

Hello, I hope this letter finds you well. I'm sorry all of this is out of the blue, but I wasn't sure of a better way to get into contact with you without seeming even more intrusive. Though I guess this may already be too much. I'm sorry if all this is scattered as well, I'm honestly not too sure what to say here. I mostly just wanted to apologize and offer you the chance to meet me again, if you wish to take it.

Then, maybe I should reintroduce myself, the last time you saw me, you were only five, I wouldn't fault you for not remembering me.'

They paused, having to read that last sentence again. Five? But that didn't make since, five was when...

Suddenly, a thought hit them and Akira swallowed hard in an attempt to push it away again, hands starting to shake. It didn't make sense. It was impossible. It couldn't be-

'My name is Romilly Tovio. I am your biological mother.'

A strangled cry escaped Akira's mouth without their permission and the room spun. Yet, they forced their eyes to move. Forced themself to keep reading.

Because there had to be an explanation.

Maybe it was a joke. A mistake. Something, anything!

She wouldn't just show up like this. It didn't make sense.

'I've been trying to find and contact you for some time now, if only to know you're doing okay and let you know that I never wanted to leave you behind. I know this probably doesn't make sense, but I really do care about you, and I miss you so, so much. Of course, I don't expect you to want to see me again after what I did, but I thought you should at least have the ability to. I've left my number at the end of this letter, if you want to talk I'll tell you anything you want to know, just call.

I'm sorry again. I love you.

Best wishes,

Mom.'

Akira stared and part of them registered that they were crying as teardrops hit the paper, as the letter was gently taken from their hands and someone touched their shoulder and something was said, probably in an attempt to redirect their attention, but the world was too fuzzy and their mind was moving too fast to care. A million questions pulling themselves to the front, fighting for attention.

Why? Why was she reaching out in the first place? Why now? Why when everything was finally falling into place? Why was she pretending to care after all this time?

And how had she managed to find them in the first place? How long had she been searching? How much did she know? She'd delivered the letter directly to their house, did that mean they were in danger? Did that mean that the others were in danger?

Their breathing accelerated and their heart pounded in their skull.

What did she really want?

Because there was no way in hell she had dropped them off, left them to die, and she was showing up now. No way in hell she actually cared.

Because if she cared, that meant everything Akira had gone through, everything they had fought for, all the people they had hurt, were a mistake. That meant that literally everything Akira had forced themself to believe, every idea that they'd based their personality on was a lie.

Far off, they felt a weight on their lap, half-registering that it must be Merlin. That fact allowed enough of a margin in their racing thoughts for them to process a single, worried voice amidst their spiral.

"'Quila!"

Without really thinking, or maybe thinking too much, Akira's eyes snapped toward Garvin and their body automatically reached for him, falling into his chest the second his arms wrapped around them, only to fall into another bout of sobbing under the comforting touch.

---

Ingall looked up when Merlin did, smiling softly when Revan came into veiw, only to be tackled by an overly excited Nico who, to his credit, he caught with much more grace than Gall thought he could, even in heels.

"Hi Revy! Welcome home!"

"Thank you, Nico. Hello everyone."

"'Sup Vans."

"Hey Revan."

"How was your day?"

Revan nodded slightly and, with Nico hanging off his arm, b-lined to the table, eyes fixed on Akira even as he answered Ingall, holding up an envelope as he approached.

"Good. I found it in the mail when I got here. It has your name, but there's no return address or anything, not even a stamp, the person would have had to deliver it by hand."

Akira's brow furrowed at that and Angel inched closer. A hand-written letter was unusual. The vast majority of the group's friends lived somewhat nearby as far as Gall could remember, and those who didn't communicated through text or call.

"Mmm, weird. The fuck writes anymore?"

He nodded in quiet agreement and then, for what felt far too long, the kitchen fell completely silent, everyone watching Akira for a sign of, well... anything.

Unfortunately, the sign was obvious but unwelcome. At first, Akira's confused frown deepened and their eyes seemed to skim the same line again, then, their hands started to shake.

After that, everything fell apart very quickly. A strangled cry slipped past Akira's lips, soon followed by accelerated breathing and then tears.

"Kiki?" Nico's voice, while full of concern, was also confused and their respnse was almost delayed as she slowly got up and walked around the table. Ingall himself felt frozen in shock. While Akira had made progress in opening up, he'd never actually seen them break down. Much less like this, out of nowhere. Akira had always been the support, both physical and emotional, and, though he was well aware that a lot of it was masking, Gall had always kind of seen them as the most stable. Of course he wished they would trust them and feel safe enough to show all of their emotions, but that didn't take away any of the shock when it actually happen, in such a violent way, non-the-less. "Um, hey, it's okay. It's gonna be fine!"

Nico's attempt at optimism, which usually came so naturally to her, even in times of crisis, was lacking and shaky, more like a question than a statement. Not that Angel could fault him for it.

Revan moved next, carefully pulling the paper from Akira's fingers as Nico hesitantly reached out to touch their shoulder, only to pause and pull back. With Akira having never broken down before, they were all a bit clueless on what would help and what would make things worse.

"'Ey, 'quila?"

Garvin's attempt was cut short as Revan shifted. When Ingall looked over he found the others eyes were slightly rounded in surprise and he cleared his throat before speaking slowly.

"The letter is from someone claiming to be their mother."

That alone sent another shock through Gall's system and he turned back to Akira, shaking his head.

"But, I thought..."

Nico trailed off, but she didn't have to finish the sentence for them to understand. It was likely they'd all been thinking the same thing.

They had though Akira's mother was dead.

But then, Akira had never really talked about... Well, anything relating to their past beyond Everett, Leo, and Kumi, who they called their 'family,' and vaguely mentioning they had lived on the streets for a time.

Whining softly, Merlin stood from where he was at Garvin's feet and took a few steps toward Akira, resting his head on their lap. As he did so, Garvin spoke again, slightly louder this time but still gentle, still worried.

"'Quila!"

This time, Akira's head snapped up, eyes locking on Garvin for a split second, long enough for them to practically fall foward into him, causing Merlin to have to step back to dodge, and immediately break down in another fit of sobbing as Garvin scrambled to support them properly.

Nico watched silently, eyes dark with pain and concern.

"Ingall." His eyes flicked over to Revan, who he hadn't even realized had stood up and was watching him. "Do you need your gloves?"

His eyes flicked down to his own hands and he winced as he processed the fact that he'd started scratching at the back of his hands without even realizing it. He tried opening his mouth only to find that his throat felt tight, so he simply nodded instead, a hint of guilt tugging at his heart at the thought of distracting the attention from Akira.

Revan simply nodded, disappearing from the room only to come back a moment with a fresh pair of white compression gloves, which he handed over with a small smile.

Nico was standing at this point as well, but seemed at a loss as he quietly watched Garvin rock a still struggling but at least marginally better Akira, lightly rubbing circles into their back, something Ingall was aware Akira had done for Garvin several times over as well.

"Alright," Revan paused, taking a breath and seeming to analyze the situation before nodding to himself. "I think we should move them to the couch if we're able to. Once they calm a little more we can see if they want to talk, sleep, or watch something. Right now, there's not much more we can do."

Garvin nodded blankly, shifting himself slightly in an attempt to find a way to support them enough to carry them. Nico stepped forward hesitantly to help, only to pause when they seemed to come to the conclusion that, with how Akira had wrapped themself around Garvin, there wasn't much she could actually do.

Merlin, on the other hand, stood and positioned himself in a way that would support Garvin as he walked, even with the extra weight, leaving Ingall to shoot a silent thanks in the dane's direction.

Slowly, the entire group migrated toward the living room, eventually ending with Garvin sitting on the couch with Akira, who had gone silent and seemed to be dissociating at this point, still burrowed into him, and Nico, who had finally settled on physical comfort, curling up to Garvin's side and reaching out to gently take one of Akira's hands.

Meanwhile, Ingall was actively fighting the urge to go into a cleaning frenzy, hands itching even with the pressure gloves. He felt Revan walk up beside him, keeping a gap between them, likely in order to prevent further stressors, and speak softly.

"I think the cookies will be done soon, would you like to help me plate them and bring them out for when Akira's feeling better?"

His tone was even and questioning, void of pressure and anxiety, and Ingall nodded, grateful both for that fact and for something to do other than stand around and wait.

Rev smiled lightly and lead the way back into the kitchen. He was, in fact, correct about the cookies being almost done and Gall barely repressed a relieved sigh as he stopped the timer a couple of seconds before it could go off and potentially retrigger Akira or one of the others.

The next few minutes passed in relative silence, but he felt himself starting to relax as the warm aroma of chocolate filled the air, an almost homely scent that temporarily soothed his racing mind. At his side, Revan helped him stack the cookies in a neat pile, allowing for a cleaner look and subtle feeling of control and further relief, and, by the time they were done and returned to the living room, the TV was already quietly playing Star Trek and Akira had once again shifted in Garvin's arms, still refusing to fully let go, but giving themself a veiw of the show. Garvin's chin was resting on their shoulder and his hands were wrapped around their middle while Nico had moved closer, smiling very faintly at the fact that Akira was now returning the hand-holding.

Their eyes were still clouded and clearly struggling to focus, but they looked more stable. Able, at the very least, to move and somewhat communicate.

Ingall took a deep breath and walked over, silently extending the plate to the other three and wishing his throat didn't still feel like a boulder was lodged in it.

"The cookies are ready if you would like some."

He shot another grateful look toward Revan, who just nodded slightly in response. Akira glanced over briefly and sank back into Garvin, seeming to hesitate before slowly reaching out to take one, quickly followed by a smiling Nico who grabbed two. One for she kept himself and the other they reached over to place in Garvin's mouth, earned a (admittedly less enthusiastic than usual) snicker and "Tanks" spoken around the cookie.

And, for a split second, Akira's lips tugged up the slightest bit and Ingall's shoulders relaxed in relief.

It was only faint, but it was there, and that was proof enough for him that, with some help, Aki would be okay.

They would all be okay.