Okay, funny time to balance out the amount of angst, lmaooo
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More Smosh incorrect quotes for (mostly future,) AFCS characters, featuring Garvin being mildly problematic, lol
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*The gang is hanging out at the Polycule's, and Aries is trying to explain something*
Aries, in the middle of explaining some random shit: "None of the khakis ever fit me because I was really tall-"
Briar, smirking and interrupting Aries: "You got that fat ass!"
Aries, looking over in disappointment: "No, I was tall!"
*Literally everyone else loses it*
Aries, in mild disbelief at what his partner just said: "I was fucking tall!"
Briar, slightly ashamed but also still snickering: "Oh, okay. My bad-"
Aries, going through the stages of grief while everyone else dies of laughter: "Bitch!"
Briar, trying to back-pedal to not get into trouble with their boyfriend while also still being heavily amused: "I'm sorry, my bad."
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*The gang, playing Eat It or Yeet It and a white liquid is put in front of them*
Ingall, who's watching from a distance: "Okay, open your eyes!"
Akira, after taking one look: "It's cum!"
Garvin, snickering: "Yay! Can I get a straw?"
*Everyone loses it*
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*The gang are playing "Bepordy" and Ingall's the host, the final "Bepordy" is revealed to be a fill in the blank of female and male anatomy*
Ingall: "Why don't you all flip them (the boards) over and take a look."
Nico, sighing: "I knew it."
Haila, mildly concerned: "I fucking knew it!
Garvin, very concerned: "Oh no. Shit!"
Ingall, smiling slightly: "Alright, so as you can see, there's a bunch of blank spaces there!"
Akira, getting more concerned: "Being here sucks."
Ingall, unfazed: "You are going to fill in the blanks on the images of the female and male reproductive systems."
Garvin, shaking his head: "Don't make me do this. Don't make me do this!"
Garvin, looking toward Clio and Haila, the only two in the room with female anatomy: "At least y'all go to, like, a doctor that talks about this stuff all the time."
Haila, confused and concerned: "Bro! You don't go to the dick doc?!"
Akira, well aware that attempts were made to get Garvin to get check-ups, amused and mocking the doctor: "Yo, what is up, Garvin?! Welcome to the dick doc!"
Garvin, growing serious, shooting a quick glare at Revan (who made the appointment): "I did one time go and he stuck his finger up my ass."
*Everyone loses it*
Ingall, looking at Garvin in amused concern: "It's the way you delivered that! You delivered it like that wasn't part of the exam. That's the problem."
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*The group presenting different, fake solutions to the problem of schooling... or somethin' like that. It's Garvin's turn*
Garvin, from behind a curtain: "So, we can all agree that colleges are looking for students that help set them apart from other colleges, they want something that no other college has, correct?"
*Various sounds of agreement from everyone*
Garvin, still behind the curtain: "Okay, great! And you can also agree that colleges are also looking for diversity. Like, they want-"
Revan, rubbing his temple while everyone else looks very concerned for whatever the fuck Garvin is about to do: "Oh shit-"
Garvin, continuing to speak: "They want to show that they consider everyone that they're forward thinking, that they're progressive! Right?"
Revan, sighing: "Buckle up."
*Various worried sounds of agreement from everyone, very unenthusiastic*
Garvin, still behind the curtain: "So I'm about to deliver something that a college has never seen before, and are gonna scramble to- to admit! Or else be left behind in the dust."
Garvin, walking out in a robot costume, speaking like a robot: "Welcome to: Matt GPT! Hello, I am Matt GPT. I am the first ever AI to go to college."
Revan: "I gotta say I'm relieved."
Ingall, nodding: "Yep! It's the best of all possible worlds!"
Aries, dramatically, pointing at the metal on Garvin's head: "Thank. God! Thank god that's on your head!"
Briar, nodding knowingly: "Yeah, I thought I was about to see some shit I could not unsee, frankly. I was like 'Oh no, another conversation.'"
*Everyone laughs, Garvin snickers*
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*The gang playing "Bepordy," the question is 'What senses are babies born with?'*
Akira, going through all the senses: "Babies can see. Babies can hear."
Garvin, mildly annoyed because Akira stole the question: "I know they can see!"
Akira, continuing and ignoring Garvin: "Babies can touch, because you spank 'em and they start cryin'! Uh- I don't know if babies can smell-"
*Everyone laughs*
Akira, shrugging: "'Cause I've never heard- Have you ever heard a baby be like "Mmm, that smells good?""
Nico, chuckling: "Yeah, do you think they they smell good?"
Akira, shrugging again, laughing a little: "I don't know, I've never talked to a baby!"