Ingall: What’s your body count?
Garvin: Do you mean sex or murder?
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Ingall: I feel like doing something stupid.
Garvin: I’m stupid, do me.
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Ingall: Are you ready to commit?
Garvin: Like, a crime or a relationship?
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Devery: You have an impressive pain tolerance.
Garvin: Thanks, it's the trauma.
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Garvin: I can never give Ingall shit because I’m jealous of them. They look at their life and say, “Sweet! This is perfect!”
Garvin: I look at my life and say, “Welp. Time to get drunk.”
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Ingall: You need to stop swearing so much.
Garvin: Shut the fuck up.
Ingall: Yeah, that's not how you do it.
Garvin: Alright sorry. It's just that it's hard not to swear. The words just creep up on me when I least expect it.
Ingall: Now now, don't be like that. Just replace the swear words with 'beep' and you'll be fine.
Garvin: Shit the beep up.
Ingall:
Garvin: SHUT, DAMMIT! I MEANT SHUT!
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Garvin: Don’t worry, I know exactly what I’m doing. Everything is going to be fine!
Ingall: How can you still say that?
Garvin: Because sometimes, when things get tough, denial is all we have.
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Garvin: Swear words are illegal now. If you say one you'll be fined.
Devery: Heck.
Garvin: You're on thin fucking ice.
Garvin: Oh no-
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Devery: The real treasure was the memories we made along the way.
Garvin: I almost died.
Devery: That... was my favorite memory.
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Garvin: Devery! For the love of god, please turn down that music. I have a hangover.
Devery: *blasting the mii theme at full volume* That sounds like a you problem, not a mii problem.
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Ingall: Pick a card, any card.
Garvin: Fine.
Ingall: Wait, that's my credit card!
Garvin: You said any card.
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Garvin: Hey guys, I found a spider. Cool little lad. Thanks for eating the mosquitos.
Garvin: Oh no, where did it go?
Devery: GARVIN WHAT THE FUCK?!
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Garvin, excitedly: Heeyy!!
Ingall: Hey, someone's excited.
Devery, deadpan: Yeah, and it's making me sick.
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Ingall: Hey Garvin, Devery just broke my seashell lamp.
Garvin: Neat. I’m gonna die alone.
Ingall: Okay, you win.
-
Ingall: Anyone else feel good when their brain releases a bunch of endorphins?
Devery: Can't relate.
Garvin: Why would my brain release a bunch of dolphins?
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Devery: Who knew getting in trouble would be so impossible?
Ingall: I gotta give you credit, Garvin. You make it look easy.
Garvin: Years of practice.
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Garvin: We need to open this locked door. Ingall, give me your credit card.
Ingall: Here.
Garvin, pocketing it: Thanks. Devery, break down the door.
-
Ingall: What do we say when making bread?
Devery, glumly: That's the dough rising.
Ingall: And what do we NOT say?
Garvin, sadly: That's the yeast fucking.
Winter 
Day 
