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Darkseeker
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Catalina: Poison is a magic transmutation potion that turns people into corpses.
Bastien: This knife is actually a magic wand.
Tiras: Meet me in the Denny’s parking lot for a wizard duel.
William: *cocks gun* Magic missile.
Ember: What the fuck is wrong with you people. |
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Darkseeker
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Clovis: Why would you think any of this was a good idea?!
Blake: Probably because I’m a dangerous sociopath with a long line of violence.
Clovis: Oh...
Tiras, from across the room: *from across the room* I don’t understand how you keep forgetting that. |
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Lightbringer
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Danse Macabre said:
Catalina: *spits mouthful of blood onto floor* You’ve become far more powerful since we last crossed paths. Dentist: Please stop, there’s literally a sink right next to you.
OMG SHE HAAAAAATES THE DENTIST - she thinks going is stupid cause they tell her the same thing every time |
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Neutral
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I love how most of these are just roasts against Clovis and Tiras, with Blake typically being the straight man of the joke. |
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Darkseeker
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William: You've been given a new job to do, but I'm worried it might make you angry.
Tiras: Just say it quick, like ripping off a band-aid.
William: You have to teach Deamon how to drive.
Tiras: ...put the band-aid back on. - - - - I'm actually crying That would go terribly wrong Good luck Tiras |
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Lightbringer
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M I S E R Y said:
I am cackling.
🌈Skittles said:
Catalina: I've met a lot of pricks in my time, but you, Clovis, are a fucking cactus. - - - - *wheezeee*
Yes. This is now canon and no one is telling me otherwise |
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Neutral
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RedRiot said:
Danse Macabre said:
Catalina: *spits mouthful of blood onto floor* You’ve become far more powerful since we last crossed paths. Dentist: Please stop, there’s literally a sink right next to you.
OMG SHE HAAAAAATES THE DENTIST - she thinks going is stupid cause they tell her the same thing every time
Dentist: Stop eating candy, young lady. |
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Darkseeker
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Blake: Don't joke about murder. I was murdered once and it offends me. |
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Lightbringer
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Danse Macabre said:
RedRiot said:
Danse Macabre said:
Catalina: *spits mouthful of blood onto floor* You’ve become far more powerful since we last crossed paths. Dentist: Please stop, there’s literally a sink right next to you.
OMG SHE HAAAAAATES THE DENTIST - she thinks going is stupid cause they tell her the same thing every time
Dentist: Stop eating candy, young lady.
That, and her teeth are fine except she grinds her jaw in her sleep so hard her gums bleed |
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Darkseeker
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Catalina: Why is Clovis crying on the floor?
William: They're drunk.
Catalina: And?
William: They saw a picture of Tiras's spouse.
Catalina: But they're Tiras's spouse.
William: I know. - - - - No context needed here |
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Summer 
Day Weather: 
