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 distant-lands
02:49:09 katy | beetle
hehe finally done with fixing my forum >:)
 Polargeist
02:01:33 Chro (he/him)
ET -
Ahh well hope you get through the day man <3 and go to sleep early next nigh then
It iss, I'll try to get out a little bit but we'll see ueue. Save me
 Collar
01:59:43 ♰ Vapor ♰
It makes ME wanna animate oughhh
 Continental Wolves
01:59:24 Emmet , Spoopy Wolf
BJake
My brain isnt properly functioning right now and I forgot to complement your art, it looks good for a first time animation
 Collar
01:58:35 ♰ Vapor ♰
BJake

*^* Could never forget you

I just hopped on for a bit though hehe
Finished up some goofy thick line OC responses, its good
 BJake
01:57:15 Don't call me BJ.
@Collar
Thank you!! I thought I'd been forgotten in chat :'0
 Collar
01:54:29 ♰ Vapor ♰
BJake

thats SO good dude omg! very pretty :3
 Continental Wolves
01:50:52 Emmet , Spoopy Wolf
ET
Sleep like you already have a coffin picked out
 Eternity
01:49:04 ET
Beetle
Eyy I'm glad! :D

Polar
Dude I wish I could tell you, I'm so tired man </3
Wah, that is so tragic </3 I hope you manage to recover quickly or are at least feeling a lil better by the end of today
 Polargeist
01:47:36 Chro (he/him)
ET -
Yeez what is your sleep schedule man </3 I'm only one hour ahead of you now too
I don't knowww, this always happens :'D missing out on skiing with my cousins now grrh
 distant-lands
01:47:20 katy | beetle
almost done fixing my forum <3 it looks so much better
 Eternity
01:46:31 ET
Nevermore
...Yeah sounds about right.

Continental
Ugh, you're right. I should sleep like I'm already in a grave
 Eternity
01:45:48 ET
I've been up so long Polar is awake, god damn

How are you sick again </3
 skeet
01:39:23 
-WP Click-
YES!! Finally a GB after trying for so long :,)
 BJake
01:36:20 Don't call me BJ.
-Click-
First animated pixel Icon I've ever made. I am proud of myself ._.
 Polargeist
01:31:10 Chro (he/him)
Goood damn it why do I always get sick when on vacation
 Continental Wolves
01:20:54 Emmet , Spoopy Wolf
ET
As an old person you should get more sleep
 Lackadaisy
01:17:32 Stray, LT | H/H
I scalded off my tastebuds so it feels like there's hair on my tongue every time I drink something.
 Nevermore.
01:07:52 Never/Nev
ET

Uhh you know, I really should go and check the permits.. Shitty people allow shitty buildings.
 Eternity
01:07:28 ET
I would also like to sleep but there's really no point as my alarm goes off in 53 minutes.

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Forums > Socialize
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I dont wanna be a broke college student :)December 31, 2022 06:34 PM


Former Pack

Neutral
 
Posts: 0
#2846005
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Getting straight into it. I have this little scholarship essay, a looming due date, and nobody to look over it for me. Help?

Prompt: What are your education and Career Goals? How do you plan on impacting your community in the future?

Essay: Min- 250. Max-500. Current- 261

Revised: 258 words.

My name is []. I'm a senior at [] High School, and my goal, once I graduate, is to pursue an Associate Degree in Baking and Pastry Arts and a Bachelor's in Food and Beverage Management at [] & [] University. This will prepare me for owning my own business in the future. What made me desire a career in this field? My passion for baking, as well as the sheer joy I felt when seeing others enjoy the dishes I made The happiness that I was able to create using nothing but my hands and mediocre skills gave me a sense of fulfillment. I then knew that, unlike other hobbies I had tried, this was what I truly enjoyed and wished to spend time furthering my knowledge of. When I first had the thought of owning my own business, I didn't think of doing much with it. Before long, I began to think of all the good I could do for those in situations that I could have been in, had I not been so fortunate. My wish is to create a community filled with acceptance and warmth by using any business I create. What I wish to do is hire certain nonviolent criminals and those who are beginning to age out of the foster care system, therefore giving a second chance to those who need it. This scholarship would allow me to gain the skills necessary to not only survive but thrive in my chosen field, as well as use my experience to help others thrive.


Edited at December 31, 2022 08:21 PM by Flower Field
I dont wanna be a broke college student :)December 31, 2022 06:43 PM


Former Pack

Neutral
 
Posts: 0
#2846007
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It's good, but I feel like there are still some things you could improve
I dont wanna be a broke college student :)December 31, 2022 06:46 PM


Wilted

Darkseeker
 
Posts: 376
#2846008
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Heyo, I would replace a bit of your wording;
"while also" -> "in addition to",
"Before too long, however," -> "Not too long after".
Apologies if this was vague or didn't make sense, I'm a little tired hehe. There's a whole list somewhere, but I forgot what it's called.
However if your school has a career center or similar, I do recommend going there or asking a trusted teacher!
I dont wanna be a broke college student :)December 31, 2022 06:54 PM


Former Pack

Neutral
 
Posts: 0
#2846010
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It does help! Also, I wish I could ask a teacher to look it over but the due date is before winter break is over so most of my teachers aren't checking their email.

Wilted said:
Heyo, I would replace a bit of your wording;
"while also" -> "in addition to",
"Before too long, however," -> "Not too long after".
Apologies if this was vague or didn't make sense, I'm a little tired hehe. There's a whole list somewhere, but I forgot what it's called.
However if your school has a career center or similar, I do recommend going there or asking a trusted teacher!


I dont wanna be a broke college student :)December 31, 2022 07:08 PM


Former Pack

Neutral
 
Posts: 0
#2846016
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--

Edited at December 31, 2022 07:53 PM by Flower Field
I dont wanna be a broke college student :)December 31, 2022 07:20 PM


Wilted

Darkseeker
 
Posts: 376
#2846020
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Hmm, have you tried reading this out loud? There's a lot of commas/pauses. I wouldn't exactly try to compress everything into one sentence, as that can be a mouthful (brainful? I'm still tired).
Try splitting them up a bit?
I dont wanna be a broke college student :)December 31, 2022 08:30 PM


Former Pack

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Posts: 0
#2846032
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Try to change "What made me desire a career in this field? My passion for baking, as well as the sheer joy I felt when seeing others enjoy the dishes I made" to:
My passion for baking made me desire a career in this field, as well as the sheer joy I felt when seeing others enjoy the dishes I made.
I dont wanna be a broke college student :)December 31, 2022 08:33 PM


Former Pack

Neutral
 
Posts: 0
#2846033
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Be sure to add a period between 'made' and 'the'
My passion for baking, as well as the sheer joy I felt when seeing others enjoy the dishes I made The happiness that I was able to create using nothing but my hands and mediocre skills gave me a sense of fulfillment.
Should be
My passion for baking, as well as the sheer joy I felt when seeing others enjoy the dishes I made. The happiness that I was able to create using nothing but my hands and mediocre skills gave me a sense of fulfillment.
I dont wanna be a broke college student :)December 31, 2022 08:34 PM


Former Pack

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Posts: 0
#2846035
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I'm just pointing out minor things that need to be fixed for now
I dont wanna be a broke college student :)December 31, 2022 08:35 PM


Former Pack

Neutral
 
Posts: 0
#2846036
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Wow, kinda embarrassed I didn't notice I forgot a period lol
Also, I appreciate any and all help!

Edited at December 31, 2022 08:36 PM by Flower Field

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