I am bored, so I am going to annoy you all with incorrect quotes. Yay!
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*The squad is over at Cal's house*
Ethan: Ohhhh, we each get our own oven?
Cal: ... N-No...
Cal, laughing: How many ovens do you think I have???
Ethan, motioning to their kitchen: Three, I thought!
Leroy: I see a-
Cal, motioning to one device: This is a microwave.
Ethan: Oh, well I-
Cal: Hey wait wait, actually- hang on- *fiddles with the buttons on the microwave*
Cal, amazed: Its got a bake setting!
Nabih: Ohoho, you learn something new every day!
Aries: Do we- Do we roshambo for who gets to pick first?
Cal: Now I've just discovered I have more ovens than I thought, we don't have to roshambo nothin!
Cal: I am someone who owns four ovens...
Cal, louder and way too happy: I am someone... who owns FOUR OVENS...
Cal: I didn't know I was so rich with ovens...
Eva, pointing to another appliance: Also the toaster oven!
Cal:
Ethan: Ohhh, toasty boy! Four- Five ovens!
Cal:
Cal, fucking ECSTATIC: I AM SOMEONE WHO OWNS FIVE OVENS
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Tyler: I’m gonna need a human skull and I can't have you ask any questions why.
Ethan: Only if you also don't ask why
Ethan: *Pulls out 7 pristine human skulls* Take your pick.
Tyler:
Ethan:
Tyler: This one is fine
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*Ethan and Tyler skipping stones on the lake*
Ethan: It’s such a beautiful evening.
Tyler, whispering: Take that you fucking lake
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Ethan: Jail is no fun. I’ll tell you that much.
Tyler: Oh, you’ve been?
Ethan: Once. In Monopoly.
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Ethan: This is a mistake
Tyler, enthusiastically: A mistake we're going to laugh about one day!
Ethan: But not today
Tyler, still enthusiastic: Oh, no. Today's going to be a mess
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Ethan: This is such a bad idea.
Tyler: Then why are you coming along?
Ethan: One of us needs to be able to talk the cops out of arresting us when this inevitably goes wrong.
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Axel: Ok, maybe playing ‘whose family is most dysfunctional’ wasn’t the best idea we’ve had. Ethan's been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can’t get them out...
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Cal: Fuck.
Ethan: We've got to work on your cursing.
Cal: Why? I'm pretty good at cursing already.
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Cal: Date someone who will drag you outside at 3am to look at the stars.
Leroy: If anyone, and I mean anyone, wakes me up at 3am to go look at the damn sky they will be removed indefinitely from my life.
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Cal: Am I going too far?
Ethan: No, no, no. You went too far about seven hours ago. Now you're going to prison.
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Cal: I've already sent good vibes your way… they’re coming. There’s nothing you can do to stop them.
Ethan: This is the most threatening way I’ve ever been cheered up.
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Cal: You love me, right, Ethan?
Ethan: Normally, I’d say yes without hesitation, but I feel like this is going somewhere and I don’t like it.
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Axel: We need a distraction.
Aries: Is anyone here good at jumping up and down and making weird noises?
Cal, whispering: My time has come
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Axel: I love you guys, you're the best thing that's happened to me.
Aries: We're the best thing that's ever happened to you?
Axel: Yes!
Cal: I'm starting to feel a little sorry for you.
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Axel: You have to apologize to Aries
Cal: Fine.
Cal: 'Unfuck you' or whatever.
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Axel: Come on, I wasn’t that drunk last night.
Aries: You were flirting with Cal.
Axel: So what? They're my partner.
Aries: You asked them if they were single.
Axel:
Aries: And then you cried when they said they weren't.
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Cal: Is letting someone win at chess sapiosexual bottoming
Leroy: Does anyone in this godforsaken group ever think before they speak
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Cal: I'm incredibly fast at math.
Leroy: Alright, what's 30x17?
Cal: 47
Leroy: That's not even close.
Cal: But it was fast.
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Cal: I learned some very valuable lessons from this.
Leroy: I’m guessing they are all horrible distortions on the lessons you actually should’ve taken away.
Cal: Death isn’t real, and I’m basically God.
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Cal: Am I in trouble?
Leroy: Take a guess.
Cal: No?
Leroy: Take another guess.
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Cal: Okay, help me, please!
Leroy: Got two words for you.
Cal: I bet they won't be helpful.
Leroy: Your problem.
Cal: I was right
Spring Month: 1 
Day 
Light Rain
