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Lightbringer
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Darkseeker
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i only have read the first chapter so far but MY GOD?? the way you perfectly set the scene is so good, i could picture exactly where Varian was and how he was feeling D: so goood, i can't wait to impulse read all of it right now
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Lightbringer
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OH Geez XD well, I definitely welcome feedback! Help me get better in writing. :3 imma... go eat dinner. XD
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Darkseeker
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i'm not a writer myself, just an avid reader so feedback is not my forte xD it looks great to me though! i especially like how you seperate the speech from the other text so it's easier to read.
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Lightbringer
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I'm glad! I remember reading somewhere a long time ago that when someone new speaks, you put in a new paragraph. Since I've wanted to be an author I picked up the habit and haven't let it go since!
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