So, I will never look at wheelchairs the same way again. Let me tell you of the Great Cooper Wing Heist. So, at my dad's college, they had a dining hall (Cooper Hall), and every now and again, like just a few times every school year, they'd have a buffalo wing buffet. You could get as many wings as you liked, but nobody could walk out with any of the food. But these were apparently super good wings, especially for college food in the day. And my dad and his buddies, they really liked wings, and as broke college students, they couldn't afford to just get wings whenever. So the next time the dining hall had wings, they were prepared. They got themselves a bunch of those gallon zip-lock bags stuffed in their pockets and kept getting more wings and filling the bags. Once they'd filled like, ten or so of them, they realized that they couldn't smuggle out all the food, not by just walking out the door, because campus security was always around the dining hall at the time. So they go up to this girl in a wheelchair, and they strike a deal. Because she was in a wheelchair, she had access to an elevator in order to get around, because stairs. They stash these bags of wings all over her wheelchair, and when they're all done, my dad and one of his buddies push this girl's wheelchair to the elevator. There was one of the teachers in with them, so they had to keep up the act of helping the girl to her dorm. When they were free of supervision, all the bags of buffalo wings were taken and distributed among the conspirators. They ate wings for nearly every meal until they literally could not stand to eat any more chicken for months. They ended up throwing out like two and a half bags by the end of it. You can tell where I got my everything from.
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