Maxi; “What are you doing?”

Hikaru, digging through a jar of M&M’s and putting some in a separate bowl; “Garvin really likes the brown ones, so I’m separating them.”

Maxi; “Aw, that’s so sweet!”

Hikaru; “What? No. I plan to eat them in front of him and then run.”

-

Garvin; “If you cut your leg off, does it hurt?”

Darla; “Of course it would hurt if you cut your leg off!”

Garvin; “Where though?”

Darla; “In your leg-”

Garvin;

Darla;

Darla; “Hikaru!”

-

Tory, to Garvin; “Here’s your christmas present! I hope you like it!”

Garvin, already crying; “I love it, thank you.”

Hikaru; “You got to, um, take the wrapping off to see what it is-”

Garvin, fully sobbing; “It’s the best gift I’ve ever received.”

-

Darla; “What are you doing?”

Garvin; “Helping Hikaru look for their box of cornflakes that I ate an hour ago.”

-

Tory; “You know, I’m starting to regret showing you how that blender works.”

Garvin, drinking toast; “Why do you say that?”

-

Garvin; “My anxiety may be chronic but this ass is iconic.”

-

Garvin; “Dear friends, your Christmas gift this year… is me. That’s right, another year of friendship. Your membership has been renewed.”

-

Garvin; “I can explain.”

Darla; “Can you?”

Garvin; “If you give me thirty seconds to think of a lie.”

-

Tory; “Garvin, you’ve ingested a dangerous amount of alcohol.”

Garvin; “The only dangerous amount is none!”