Koen didn’t flinch.
The Angel’s words slid beneath his skin like ice water—deliberate, scalpel-sharp—but he didn’t flinch. Even as his pulse kicked up in his throat and something in his chest pulled tight like a wire about to snap, he kept his feet planted and his expression steady. He’d learned young how to mask a gut-punch. That you couldn’t let people see how bad it hurt when they talked about your family like they were a tragedy. Orin’s voice might’ve been velvet-laced, but the meaning in it was as jagged as broken glass.
He stared straight back at her, dark brows drawn low, jaw ticking slightly. Held her gaze like she was just another gang boss on a bad night, another judge giving him that look when his record came up in court. The same look the cops gave his brother before they took him in.
The dining hall’s warmth felt too much all of a sudden. Too many bodies, too much movement, too much light. Too many voices just on the edge of laughter. It should’ve made him feel safer, surrounded by so much life. But he’d learned that safety wasn’t about the crowd—it was about who was looking at you from across it.
And right now, Orin was looking at him like a wolf sizing up a rabbit who’d forgotten what fear tasted like.
The panic flared under his ribs—irrational, sharp, like he was a kid again and the apartment window had just shattered from a bullet outside and his mom was throwing her body over his sister without thinking. But it stayed caged behind his teeth. No trembling, no retreat. Just that steady, even look.
Because Koen didn’t run. Not from loud men in alleyways, not from cold-hearted Angels, and not from the ache of wondering if his whole goddamn life had been some kind of accident waiting to be corrected.
He swallowed hard, working moisture back into his mouth. “I know where I’m from,” he said, voice low but sure. “Doesn’t mean I don't got any reason to go back.”
He left a pause there. An intelligence test. Or maybe just one to look for anger issues. Leaving spaces between his sentences to let other people fill it with their anxiety. It was a trap people often fell into, and it helped Koen decide whether or not he should bring them into the corner of the room to comfort them, or bring them in the corner of the room to slap them across the face.
He wasn’t stupid. He knew this room could probably kill him ten different ways before he even made it to the door. He could see the strength in these people, smell it in the air like a storm breaking. But the thing about growing up where he did—Chicago’s south side, in a three-room apartment where the walls were paper-thin and the lights only worked half the time—was that fear stopped working like it was supposed to. You didn’t panic when things got dangerous. You panicked when they got quiet. When no one looked your way anymore. When no one cared if you came home or didn’t.
So yeah, maybe he should’ve been afraid. But he wasn’t. He was pissed off and confused and tired and sick of being treated like he was already dead.
And maybe that’s what made Orin pause, just for a fraction of a second. That look in his eye—not defiance, not bravery, just the simple, brutal refusal to bow.
Koen held her gaze a moment longer, then blinked slowly. His voice was calmer this time, almost casual. “You want something from me? Ask. But don’t act like you know me.”
Then, because he knew how to survive a room like this, he broke eye contact first—not out of submission, but strategy. He reached forward and picked up one of the glasses from the table. Didn’t care if it was wine or some magical cocktail that’d knock him flat. He just needed something to hold. Something to anchor him. Something to make him feel like he wasn’t about to float out of his own skin. Honestly? It didn't matter if he trusted whether or not it would kill him anymore. Barely a day here and Koen's chest was already feeling tight with that urge to go hide in a bathroom. How pitying. But what was the point of going back, if he didn't have anything there anyway?
The glass was cold. Real. Heavy enough to hold onto. His fingers tightened around it.
He wasn’t sure what game they were playing here—but he’d played worse.