And then silence filled the air. Theo wasn't sure what to say, he didn't want Nike to think that the kissing meant nothing to him..it was just too soon. He needed time to think through all of this. To process through his emotions. To figure all of this out.

One could argue that there wasn't much to figure out. Nike was interested in him and he was interested in Nike. However, there was complications. His whole entire life he had been doing nothing but driving those close to him away and to their breaking point. His father claimed that it was his fault his mother died. His father became a dead-beat dad because it was his fault. He provided the money to keep the place running because it was his fault...until he ran away. He met Flynn but it was also his fault that she got pregnant. Now he was devoting his life to making things better. He was trying to do things that she would approve of and find pride in. Would she approve of this?

He had never once did something that made him happy. He had been too busy for happiness. Kissing Nike made him happy. Even now, holding him against his body made him happy. But like all good things, happiness never lasted. He learned that with his many years with Flynn. Something always destroyed his happiness. So what was he still doing here? What was he doing with Nike?

He sighed, his breath blowing some of the strands of Nike's hair. He wanted to do nothing more than bury his face into the man's hair and forget about everything. Forget about his past, his struggles, and his ex...he wanted to move on. He just didn't know how so he didn't. Instead, he directed his gaze up and took the opportunity to stargaze outside the comfort of his own window.

"You know...sometimes I like to just watch the stars from my window and try to find shapes in them," He whispered after the silence drove on for quite a long time.

The stars appeared different now that he was outside. They seemed brighter and smaller. Somehow it was easier to depict shapes from them.

"Like that one," He pointed to a group of stars away from each other,"That one looks like the eiffel tower."

"I used to have a dream of going there with my..." He trailed off, swallowing back some of the pain. He was going to say family but he didn't have one of those anymore,"I was just a kid with a stupid dream though. I needed a reality check."

The dream about the eiffel tower had been with his parents. That was a long dream. It had been ruined almost as quick as it appeared though. It seemed like everything he had ever had that was good somehow turned bad. It was repeated throughout his life and in a sense, he was just waiting for it to happen again.

"It's not bad to have dreams though, especially not when they are totally doable, they help you stay driven."

The dream about the eiffel tower, that was completely un-doable. His mother gone, his father basically dead to him... He didn't have money or a job, all his money was being used to pay for water and heat in the house. Money was also difficult to make when you are homeless. His money was still good money, earned right through being a singer, dancer, magician...anything that could be a form of entertainment on the streets he had done.

"I have no idea what you’ve been through exactly and I won't tell you to just move on because it's not that easy, I know. But you also can't use all the bad things that's happened to you as an excuse to not allow yourself happiness, it's easier said than done, I’m aware of that and I'm not the best at it myself but yeah…”

Theo pulled away just a little to look at Nike with his eyebrow raised. He hadn't allowed himself to have much happiness. Each time he did, somebody got hurt He was happy with his family but that ended, he found happiness with Flynn but that ended It was better off to not allow himself happiness. If he didn't let himself be happy, no one could get hurt.

"It's never good to just forget about the past but it shouldn't be allowed to control you either and I guess that's the hard part, it's easier to ignore and push things away until they fade…”

Now that line seemed like something he was trying to tell himself. He could recognize the signs of somebody not wanting to sleep from anywhere, he himself was still going through those. He couldn't sleep most nights, his dreams were always haunting him. He might be able to ignore most of his past throughout the day...but the night? It seemed to chase him down.

"Hey, I'm here with you," He told him, reaching out his hand and tilting his chin up to look at him,"That's got to mean something right?"

"Look, I've been through a lot. It doesn't take a genius to recognize that I have. But I'm fine," That was a little bit of a lie. He distracted himself from his past by working and taking care of the gang,"Well I'm managing."

He leaned to press a kiss against Nike's cheek. He was here with the other man. He was kissing the other man. That was progress. One step at a time.

"Look I know I'm the last person to be lecturing you on this but I know what it looks like when somebody is avoiding their dreams," He sighed, pulling back and brushing his thumb against Nike's cheek,"I really think you should get some rest."

Theo used to spend hours of the night awake just trying to escape his past. He had the worse sleep schedule known to man during that time, getting maybe an hour of sleep every two weeks. He had been stressed and worried about becoming a good gang leader since obviously he hadn't been a very good boyfriend. He had been worried about becoming his father so at night, nightmares of him repeating what his father did to him to different members of the gang kept him up. Of course, he wouldn't ever tell anybody about those dreams. Mentioning those dreams would just lead to him saying what happened to him as a kid. Nobody needed to know that, it was too personal. So it's best to ignore it.

Nobody had questioned his sleeping habits, it was the only reason why he had his own room. He could stay up all night looking out the window and at the stars. In fact, that's what he did until Alleya came to the gang. She was the only one that would hang out with him, talk to him, and treat him like a friend and not a gang leader. She, of course, started to notice his sleeping habits. She began forcing him to sleep at night. It started off with an hour of sleep every night and then two hours every night. His sleeping still wasn't perfect and he still couldn't sleep without Alleya in his room but he could sleep four hours a night now.

He thought about forcing Nike to sleep but thought better of it. He still remembered the torture and the many times he woke up screaming and crying during the first hour of sleep weeks. It did get easier with time but until the three week mark...it was mental torture. Of course, Alleya had always been right there to assure him that the nightmares would pass but it still didn't take away the pain. He didn't want anybody else to go through what he did. And besides, Nike did get some sleep. Three hours which was almost where the gang leader was at as well.

So when Nike changed the topic, Theo let him and decided not to push it. He wouldn't push it unless if the lack of sleep effected the newbie's performance in his gang.

"Have you decided on a place yet? I know Taurus probably dragged the hotel completely through the mud but it's really not that bad. Everyone would have their own room, that's something, there's a big fireplace, also nice. Sure it's rather obvious but some would argue that that could be an advantage somehow…”

He smiled and blushed at the hand kiss, his hand slipping away from the other man's face as his head went back to his shoulder. He did rather enjoy being close to him. It also didn't help that he was a rather attractive looking man, it was easy to be drawn into him like a magnet.

"Taurus place isn't that bad, it would work well, if the gang was about half its size. It's in a good spot, I won't lie, but it’s going to be cramped, and with how just Alleya and him were arguing, I doubt others would stay peaceful if you crammed them all in there.”

Theo just let Nike talk more in depth about these places. Taurus had come back pissed and barely mentioned anything about a hotel. He had to order the blond twin to stay in his room and give him a report. It hadn't been a good one whatsoever. Just that Nike and Alleya were coming back later and that Taurus picked out the best place to stay but they were jealous of his leadership abilities and couldn't argue with him. However, what Nike was describing was rather different from what was reported. The hotel sounded great. An abandoned hotel would be a step up from their current living, however, it would probably be more expensive to get water up and running. Not to mention heat. Taurus' place on the other hand sounded like it wouldn't work.

And then there was a cellar with a doped up man? Now that didn't sound fitting. He gave a small chuckle, shaking his head.

"Thank you for exploring all these places but we aren't going anywhere yet. It's always best to have option B," Theo stated. He didn't want to concern anyone so he kept it simple. The gang was going to stay as long as they could. He just didn't trust the Rebels not to pull something where his gang would lose their home.

Theo was growing rather tired now, especially with the warmth of Nike's body against his. He just knew he couldn't sleep here, not without Alleya and certainly not in the woods. He also didn't want to fall to sleep with Nike right there. The man would never trust his word again if he saw just how well the gang leader was managing,

"No problem, just don't ever put me alone with those two again, please… They were driving me insane, and quite honestly, Taurus is a shit leader."

He chuckled a little with a small shake of his head. Honestly he chose Alleya and Taurus in hopes that Nike would learn some gang skills off of them. Taurus was an excellent, thoughtful member of the gang that would have leaned toward exploring things that didn't look like an obvious gang home. He did also know the city like the back of his hand. Taurus and his twin had been outcasted to the city most of their lives. That's why he had been named leader. Alleya always had a positive way of looking at things. He had figured she would have given the boys energy to keep up the chase. She was also excellent at keeping an eye on surroundings, scavangiing, and fighting. It didn't seem like Nike learned anything from them and the trip had been a disaster.

"I would like to see these options sometime. I want somebody who is going to be level-headed and neutral about all the places to show me," He gave a small yawn and unconsciously leaned more against the other man. He was growing tired, figuratively speaking he hadn't slept for as long as Alleya had been gone. Well, except for that one day where he accidentally took way too much Tylenol,"Maybe you and I can check it out sometime?"

His offer was left in the air as the other man began to mumble something about Iris. He looked a little confused until the part about Iris being a cat popped up. The cat was probably something Alleya found, she was good at finding creatures after all. If he didn't know better, he would say animals were drawn to her.

Theo felt him nuzzle his shoulder and smiled again. His arm tightened ever so slightly around the other man in response. His head leaning back against the tree and his eyes closing. He would be lying if he said he wasn't savoring every touch this man brought to him.

He just sat there in silence, soaking in everything and every moment. He was going to remember this for centuries to come. He had never felt as happy or content as he did now. He started to drift off into sleep...that is until he heard Nike's voice and forced himself awake again.

"We should probably get going… We can't just sit here all night, people are gonna start missing their leader, and just wait until Alleya wakes up and can't find either of us, you know what she’s like."

"Wouldn't it be nice to stay here though?" He whispered, more to himself than Nike. He felt the man's head lift off of his shoulder, frowning just slightly. He knew that he was right but it didn't make it easier. He didn't want this moment to be over, not quite yet.

"You're right," He sighed, admitting defeat. He got up slowly, wincing at the immense amount of pain the action brought him. He had to grip on to the tree to steady himself and catch his breath. The pain had caught him off gaurd as the last dosage of Tylenol was wearing off and being in this cold wasn't helping his body.

Theo would never admit that his wounds hurt, if he wasn't well-trained to deal with medicine he wouldn't even medicate. Admitting that his wounds hurt was a way to worry the gang. So he just took Tylenol in the shadows and told his gang he was fine. If it wasn't for the Tylenol, he highly doubted he would be able to walk.

When Nike took his hand, he almost pulled away. Almost. If it had been anybody else, he would have but he wasn't ready to let go of the moment they shared by this tree. Not quite yet. So he hung on, interlacing his fingers with the man's. It always surprised him how the gray-haired man's hands could feel soft but yet rough at the same time. Hearing his question, he felt a spark of joy. Perhaps Nike would decide to rest and maybe he could coax the man into having just another hour of sleep. One step at a time.

Theo made sure he was steady and prepared to walk back, knowing now just how much pain was going to ripple through his body. He wanted to take more Tylenol and shove down how bad he was injured but he knew better. Last dosage was all he could take until tomorrow.

He began walking alongside Nike, letting the new gang member lead the way. He was putting in most of his energy to mask the pain he was in and not stop. The quicker they got back, the quicker he could settle down and finally sleep. Well hopefully he would be able to. Sleep included his own bed and Alleya. He was too ashamed to admit it but without her, he couldn't sleep. He was afraid to.

"We can go in a few days or so and I’ll show you the places. I need to rest before going into the city like that again, I’ve had enough of all that for some time now."

"That sounds great, thanks," His answer was short and simple, it was the best he could manage. As they continued to walk, he drifted closer and closer to Nike's side, squeezing and holding the man's hand rather tightly. He was looking forward to being back home. However, he didn't want to leave behind the memories of him and Nike or the feelings that came with it.

"Promise me you'll try to rest when we get back?" He leaned closer, pausing to manage a whisper,"Please?"

He had to try to get Nike to sleep He was worried about the man's sleeping habits He might not pry to figure out what was wrong but he would insist for him to sleep It wasn't healthy to only sleep three hours after a long exhausting trip.