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Darkseeker
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silhouetteissleepy said: Matunda said: silhouetteissleepy said: Matunda said: I just wrote 900 words of backstory for Siansa in first person just to realize it sounds cringy *^*
Nooo that's all good!! Cringe culture is dead, I personally don't mind. Especially when you're just writing for fun!! :)
So should I post it? *^*
If you'd like!! I think you should though :)
Mmh. Fine. Please do make fun of it. It's my first time ever writing in first person, and I need the trolling.
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Lightbringer
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I believe I'll be going for a Cecelia crew member, one possibly from the sea they're going ta be traveling through? Not quite sure her specialty yet, but maybe something ta do with gathering information on what's in the water around the boat (outside of giving directions if she does come from those waters).
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Darkseeker
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Lil itty bitty backstory. Very poorly and cringly written. Read with caution xD Margarita Conves. Pssh, what an utterly humiliating place to be born. Where peace is demanded and self defense is reprimanded. What a shame, jealousy is quite a curse to have. It's a shame I had to be born with it.. anyway, I'd always wondered what made my hometown have such a horrible name, and from what I could put together, it's because when it was found by a crew that all had a celebratory margarita on it. Disgusting. Alcohol was never my thing. However one thing I loved about Margarita Coves was.. it's talent and musical culture. It was true talent, not just someone playing a prerecorded tape and pretending to play the instrument. It was real music. Music originated from talent and friendship. However, I wish it was just a little less peaceful there. Then maybe I wouldn't have done what I did. There was no enemies, yet every surrounding group was always their friend. No one actually wanted to fight. We- no they could've been so much more Regrettably, I am Siansa. You probably have never heard of me. But yeah. I am Siansa. I wish my name was something much more dignified and superior sounding than it is. I hate my name. As you may have read in the paragraph before this one, I used to call a place, Margarita Coves, my home. Not anymore. I wasn't anyone important until I made the most impulsive decision of my life.. heh. I bet I'm now a story told to scare children there. My role in the tribe was pathetic, and my rank as well. I guess you can consider the same thing since it's so boring. I was a mere fighter and defender, while on the other hand, my sister was the second in command. Jealousy~ I went to a school while I was a fighter, training in something I can't recall anymore. It wasn't a very great interest of mine. However my tutor was an elderly gentleman, and very friendly. I made some friends there, but my two best friends are the only ones I care about anymore- even after my betrayal. With them, I accomplished great things! I became great with a cutlass, and also with a pistol. My aim isn't great anymore after I wounded by arm, but it's still effective. I was apparently an impressive artist too, which is surprising in my entirely honest opinion. When I became more dedicated to my tribe, aka Margarita Coves, my family was already drifted, so I never got the reassurance I truly needed at the time. My mother and father both died, my mother from undercooked fish that gave her salmonella and my father from a training accident. Lame deaths. All my four younger sisters began to resent me for honestly who knows why? Maybe I was irritating or something. Seems pretty likely. However, they absolutely adored my older sister, the oldest of us, who had a very similar personality to me. It made me feel very unwanted, and also made me resent my older sister because she loved to rub it in my face. Actually, resent is an understatement. Despise is more accurate. I decided I hated my sister so much that I was going to derank her. That didn't work, so I thought maybe try and take a leg off, but that was impossible without getting caught. The only option was to kill her. How could I be so impulsive to murder somebody because of my own jealousy? It seems in my young mind, murdering was an excellent plan. If I could reverse anything in my life, it would be that. I initiated my plan when my sister was on a nighttime walk. At first, I was going to sneak behind her and kill her quickly and efficiently, but then my young mind decided that wasn't fun enough, so I charged headfirst with my cutlass. It was a very easy fight, much to my disappointment (as a young teenager) as I ended the fight as soon as it begun. My sister froze and basically let me kill her. But then the bushes rustled behind, and a lantern glimmered across the nearby waves of the ocean. I'd been caught. My heart was pounding so much it actually begun to pang in pain with each beat. I knew it. I was busted. But when I turned to look- it was my friends. My two besties. Staring at me in shock. I jumped to try and explain, with a twist on the story, but the moment I started, they both ran. I couldn't bring myself to kill my friends, and I stood there, stunned. There was nothing I could do. I was caught. That day I lost everything. My family. My reputation. But worst of all, my friends.. When I snapped out of it, they were already after me. So I ran like my life depended on it. Because it did. If I was caught, I would've died right then and there. My ability to run was very limited, as the entire island was populated with the town. So I had no choice but to go for a little swim. Before they caught up, I dove into the water and swam. And swam. Until the light was longer visible. And I was stuck out there. I don't know what happened, but I ended up on a different island. Then ever since then, I live in regret. Constantly dreaming of what my life could've been if I hadn't acted so impulsive. - I'm so so sorry it's so bad, and so cringy. I'm very open for criticism though. - For no confusion, Siansa joined the crew about 7 years after this occurred. This is actually a small written thing she keeps, so yes, your character can find this in the actual RP. She didn't share much of her backstory, and she just told them she got exiled from her original town because she did something bad. She didn't specify though. Edited at July 14, 2024 06:22 PM by Matunda
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Neutral
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Matunda said: Lil itty bitty backstory. Very poorly and cringly written. Read with caution xD Margarita Conves. Pssh, what an utterly humiliating place to be born. Where peace is demanded and self defense is reprimanded. What a shame, jealousy is quite a curse to have. It's a shame I had to be born with it.. anyway, I'd always wondered what made my hometown have such a horrible name, and from what I could put together, it's because when it was found by a crew that all had a celebratory margarita on it. Disgusting. Alcohol was never my thing. However one thing I loved about Margarita Coves was.. it's talent and musical culture. It was true talent, not just someone playing a prerecorded tape and pretending to play the instrument. It was real music. Music originated from talent and friendship. However, I wish it was just a little less peaceful there. Then maybe I wouldn't have done what I did. There was no enemies, yet every surrounding group was always their friend. No one actually wanted to fight. We- no they could've been so much more Regrettably, I am Siansa. You probably have never heard of me. But yeah. I am Siansa. I wish my name was something much more dignified and superior sounding than it is. I hate my name. As you may have read in the paragraph before this one, I used to call a place, Margarita Coves, my home. Not anymore. I wasn't anyone important until I made the most impulsive decision of my life.. heh. I bet I'm now a story told to scare children there. My role in the tribe was pathetic, and my rank as well. I guess you can consider the same thing since it's so boring. I was a mere fighter and defender, while on the other hand, my sister was the second in command. Jealousy~ I went to a school while I was a fighter, training in something I can't recall anymore. It wasn't a very great interest of mine. However my tutor was an elderly gentleman, and very friendly. I made some friends there, but my two best friends are the only ones I care about anymore- even after my betrayal. With them, I accomplished great things! I became great with a cutlass, and also with a pistol. My aim isn't great anymore after I wounded by arm, but it's still effective. I was apparently an impressive artist too, which is surprising in my entirely honest opinion. When I became more dedicated to my tribe, aka Margarita Coves, my family was already drifted, so I never got the reassurance I truly needed at the time. My mother and father both died, my mother from undercooked fish that gave her salmonella and my father from a training accident. Lame deaths. All my four younger sisters began to resent me for honestly who knows why? Maybe I was irritating or something. Seems pretty likely. However, they absolutely adored my older sister, the oldest of us, who had a very similar personality to me. It made me feel very unwanted, and also made me resent my older sister because she loved to rub it in my face. Actually, resent is an understatement. Despise is more accurate. I decided I hated my sister so much that I was going to derank her. That didn't work, so I thought maybe try and take a leg off, but that was impossible without getting caught. The only option was to kill her. How could I be so impulsive to murder somebody because of my own jealousy? It seems in my young mind, murdering was an excellent plan. If I could reverse anything in my life, it would be that. I initiated my plan when my sister was on a nighttime walk. At first, I was going to sneak behind her and kill her quickly and efficiently, but then my young mind decided that wasn't fun enough, so I charged headfirst with my cutlass. It was a very easy fight, much to my disappointment (as a young teenager) as I ended the fight as soon as it begun. My sister froze and basically let me kill her. But then the bushes rustled behind, and a lantern glimmered across the nearby waves of the ocean. I'd been caught. My heart was pounding so much it actually begun to pang in pain with each beat. I knew it. I was busted. But when I turned to look- it was my friends. My two besties. Staring at me in shock. I jumped to try and explain, with a twist on the story, but the moment I started, they both ran. I couldn't bring myself to kill my friends, and I stood there, stunned. There was nothing I could do. I was caught. That day I lost everything. My family. My reputation. But worst of all, my friends.. When I snapped out of it, they were already after me. So I ran like my life depended on it. Because it did. If I was caught, I would've died right then and there. My ability to run was very limited, as the entire island was populated with the town. So I had no choice but to go for a little swim. Before they caught up, I dove into the water and swam. And swam. Until the light was longer visible. And I was stuck out there. I don't know what happened, but I ended up on a different island. Then ever since then, I live in regret. Constantly dreaming of what my life could've been if I hadn't acted so impulsive. - I'm so so sorry it's so bad, and so cringy. I'm very open for criticism though. - For no confusion, Siansa joined the crew about 7 years after this occurred. This is actually a small written thing she keeps, so yes, your character can find this in the actual RP. She didn't share much of her backstory, and she just told them she got exiled from her original town because she did something bad. She didn't specify though.
I love that!! :D Especially all the emotion, and also the descriptions!! My only criticism is that there's a lot of repetition, which is an easy trap to fall into and also not always a bad thing in every circumstance. I'm really proud of you for posting it as well even if you were nervous about it!!
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Neutral
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Also I've been thinking about if we're still going with the new captain idea, maybe Celes tried to take over as captain after the old one died some time before the rp starts, but ended up freaking out and realizing he wasn't ready for it yet after what happened last time when he was in a position of power, so he ends up stepping down and staying as first mate? I dunno, just an idea
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Darkseeker
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silhouetteissleepy said: I love that!! :D Especially all the emotion, and also the descriptions!! My only criticism is that there's a lot of repetition, which is an easy trap to fall into and also not always a bad thing in every circumstance. I'm really proud of you for posting it as well even if you were nervous about it!! Thank you thank you. I'll work on the repetition issue. I have a hard time thinking of different words to use in the moment I'm writing it. I should start using a thesaurus when writing. *^*
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Neutral
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hello guys! Salt shaker invited me here. This is all super interesting, do you mind if i jump in too
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Neutral
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sleepless nights said: hello guys! Salt shaker invited me here. This is all super interesting, do you mind if i jump in too
I don't mind!! :) The more the merrier!!
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Neutral
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Is ship captain still open? I think I have a silly character idea in mind
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Neutral
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From what I've seen I'm pretty sure yeah!! :) There's a list on page 15 of all the characters so far and their roles Edited at July 14, 2024 07:17 PM by silhouetteissleepy
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