My Color Wheel
(Written at midnight because I couldn't sleep until I got this out because of course I had to fall for some stupid man. If you can't tell it's reaching a point.)
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When I was young I would have a new favorite color each day.
One day it was purple- the color of the flowers in our yard.
The next it was pink- like my imaginary unicorn.
I picked arbitrarily and drew connections on a whim.
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In school colors began to gain more meaning to me.
Blue was the color of soft rain creating ripples in the lake.
Blue meant late nights asking God, "Why me?"
Orange was the harsh sheen of the summer sun on my skin.
Orange like those lazy days I dedicated to my craft.
Green was the leaves rippling in the cool breeze.
Green as the faces of those girls gossiping at lunch.
Emotions latched onto those shades.
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Now that I am older so much has changed.
Yellow used to be an ugly color.
Yellow meants grandma's curtains or post-its with forgotten reminders.
But yellow reminds me of the joy I feel with you.
Red is an angry color.
Red like destructive flames or Elmo.
But red is the color of that single rose left on my nightstand.
White and Black were both so boring.
White and Black like zebras, newspapers, and everything inbetween.
White always stained too easily.
Black was an "emo" color.
But now I daydream of that white dress,
and you in that stupid black suit.
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Colors used to mean so little;
now they hold memories of the past.
Or worse, everything I look at reminds me of you.